Episode 2: Helpless By the Shaded Lake of Despair

[Jason]

So... New team. New mofos. New gameplan.

But first things first, I've got works in progress that can turn out great.
Ellis is after Paris and they're both on my team. I need to be very supportive of this without SEEMING to be TOO supportive of it. Actually, no, I need to be very supportive of it. Taking a strong stance and being wrong will make me look less suspicious when I don't get imprisoned after a while. It worked for Darla last game, after all (DAMN IT DC I just thought about your typing method during that game...... You suck). She made a strong (and good) case on Cookie and it was wrong

Anyway, so that's the old news, the new news (That sounds weird to say) is that Levi is under heat from the OTHER team. I'm going to defend him because for one, obviously he's a citizen, two, I won't have to suffer the consequences for it, three, I've got nothing better to do.

Here's my plan for the time being, illustrated here:

[Jason]

So... I haven't been on much this week, which kind of sucks :/ I've been really busy IRL and thus this episode is going to be pretty boring for readers... Sorry, readers!! Next Episode will be way cooler!!
Anyway, here's how things are going right now; we'll begin with a rundown on my fellow Spies:

Iris - Her clock is ticking. People are sure that either Yvette, Faith, or Iris (Or any two of them) are Spies. Well, it's only a matter of time before people insist that we start voting them out, in fact, it could happen next exile for all we know (And I think there's a good chance that it will). So, even if Iris survives, which will be difficult, when Faith or Yvette goes she's that much closer to being caught, and when the other one goes... Iris is dead. Iris I think is a good player and Spy, but unfortunately she's in a position where she more or less can't win. Sucks for her, but that means I have to keep away from her.

Donald - He's been hit with a lot of early suspicion but I think that he's doing OK now. He's still got the Lurker card on him but I don't think he's in any immediate danger.

Pete - He's still in trouble... Rey and Tiberius, among others, suspect him and they're going to act on those suspicions before long. I used my Role ability on him on the off chance that one of them has some sort of investigative role. I'll talk more about how I plan to use my Role the rest of the game in the post following this one.

Amelia - She's going to be OK, I think. She's going with the 'dumb cit' plan which I actually think will serve her well for quite some time. She still needs to be a bit more active in order to shed the Lurker status but I think she's in a relatively good position right now.

Jaya - Ellis has REALLY helped Jaya out a lot by being SO sure that she's a citizen, but... I'm almost positive that his outlook is going to change drastically when Paris flips Citizen. Jaya's going to stand out as the only person left who DIDN'T vote for the first Spy and to make matters worse she voted for the Inactive that could have voted herself out. Jaya made a good short term move by sticking with Jocelyn I think, but a very bad long term move. I've been sure to mention I find her suspicious to several people since then just to set myself up as being against her when the time comes.

Jason - Jason is the coolest spy EVAR!!111ONEone James Bond would Kill (he has a License to, after all) to be as suave, cunning, and awesome as Jason is. I think he'll win the game because he drinks Mountain Dew and oozes pimp juice from ever pore. Jason is the stuff.

[Jason]

Impressions on new citizens: They're going to lose.

[Jason]

Impressions on Spies: They're going to lose.

J/K I can't be Exiled, and it won't happen!!


HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE posts incoiming, maybe tonight or maybe not, holy Mofo underneath the ledge of a skyscraper (I have NO idea what that means...) there's so much to talk about/do but all I can say...


IS I'M IN AN AWESOME POSITION despite the hell going on to the Spy team as a whole.

[Jason]

***This is going to be a rare vulgar Trey post, I can just feel the F bombs ready to explode from my mouth/fingers -_- ***


WHAT THE FUCK?!?! (see? there's one already!) First...
We lost a spy in the FIRST damn round. Holy shit that's a pathetic 3 inch dick of a way to start out a Spies game, and then... we lose... not only a Spy in round two, but a Traitor that's on our side, too!

Okay I got distracted for like 20 minutes so my tone my change.


Anyway, so... Spies gone = bad. What shall we/can we do? Well, first of all, meh I don't even know what should come first. Hmm, okay, first of all, I don't mind losing my teammates because I'm immersed in such a deep Citizen position that I think I can win with or without my Spymates.

With that being said, I can't afford to lose my Spymates.

"What the shit, Trey, you just contradicted yourself!"

Well, first of all, this is Jason speaking so STFU! Second of all, it's a necessary contradiction. Basically, I can survive with or without my Spymates BUT... I'm best off keeping them out there for now so that I can sell them down the river as I please.

"But Jason, that sounds so... backstabbingly mean!"

Well, I'm a spy. Build a bridge and get the fuck over it, bitch.

.....................So anyway, my plan right now is to be uber cool with Rey/Jenya/Tiberius/Gabriela/Ellis. We have a tight group that trusts each other and I want to keep us together for a few rounds. Then I want to start getting rid of them, slowly. Jenya can't be the first to go from that group; Tiberius most likely will be. I figure 3-5 rounds ought to be good. If any get exiled along the way I won't lose any sleep over that, either.

Anyway, wait, what was I even saying? Oh, yeah, group and stuff. Yeah. So, that group shall remain for now. It's time to start removing the threads I don't have any ink on yet.

spies6amelia (1:27:29 AM): ah
spies6amelia (1:27:45 AM): I heart vanilla vodka and black cherry Fresca
spies6jason (1:27:56 AM): Oh wow, I haven't tried that before
spies6jason (1:28:01 AM): I will before the end of this game though
spies6amelia (1:28:36 AM): if I recommend anything it's that
spies6jason (1:29:09 AM): I'm copying that mid-confessional so that I'll see it later and remember


Okay, that's out of the way. Where was I?? Ink... Oh yeah, Ink on people's thread sounds like of dirty, but yeah, basically people like Khaled, Mei Yun, Ariel, Roxy, William, Levi, Mirela, etc. need to be Imprisoned because I don't see them getting Exiled any time soon. Meanwhile we need to Exile plenty of other Citizens because well, that's sort of the object of the game for me, dumb shit. Oh, you knew that already? Well, I apologize, then.

Meanwhile, if any fellow Spies get absolutely nailed like a cheerleader on prom night I'll let them go down like a cheerleader on prom night and then I'll exile myself for using the same lame metaphor twice in one sentence. So what was the point of that? Right, to say that I'll vote a fellow Spy out and hop on the case early if it looks like they're going to be screwed like a che... err, like a lightbulb in a lamp.

I'd like to shed one or two weak links within the next 6 rounds or so. That'll satisfy the citizens' desires for Spy blood and I can make sure to make myself look good when the Spies do go. Meanwhile more citizens go. (two imprisonments this round + 6 more + 4 Exiled would mean 12 Citizens to two spies gone.). If I can succeed in that then there'll be three Spies left and some number of citizens left that I should probably check up on right now... 9 Citizens left. At that point the position I'll be in will be Moforriffic. I can trade out a Citizen here, nail a Spy there, and my plan will be to bring it down to a final three. I'd like to see Gabriela and Ed in my Final three, as of right now. Or two people similar to them. I want someone left from my Original Group 2/Team Clusterfuck with me to vote out the evil third person.

That will be EXTREMELY risky to do but it'll be way more fun and suspenseful, thus making it better to play and better for all the watchers/eliminated players. Tyson was a great Spy in Spies 2 who tried bu failed in the final 3 thing. I hope to pull it off and claim the title of Greatest Spy Ever, but it won't be easy -_-

For now, though, Mei Yun needs to go. She's a good player, smart, and has a few of my fellow Spies in mind for future exiles. Sorry hun, but there shall be no pink fluffy unicorn rides for now... Maybe after the game, if you'd like >; D

Anyway, I need sleep so that's the end of this Confessional./ I'll post a Episode Review in the morning and then it'll be on to Round Three!!

[Jason]

Oh, P.S., Jenya has a role, don't forget that, noob!

[Jason]

And I've decided that I hate the 15 second flood rule :/

[Jason]

Episode Wrapup!!

Master Mofo - Hello there, bitches and bastards of the Burg - wait, I'm not Delilah, never mind. Hello there ladies and gentlemen, tonight we're going to interview the Amazing Spy, Jason, and talk to him about the most recent episode of Spies 6! We'll get an inside look on what's happening within the game and see what plans Jason has for the future. Lets bring Jason out!!

Jason - Thank you, thank you, no need to applause so much, I'm not really worth it...

MM - You know, Jason, you don't have to be so negative all the time...

Jason - I know... I guess I can accept some applause then...

MM - Good! Well, as you know, things are looking even more grim for your Spies team at the moment, as if anyone thought that was even possible. So first things first, was this episode a complete failure?

Jason - Well, Impressive and Enigmatic host Mofo Trey, I'd argue that this episode is a complete success, actually.

MM - Could you explain?

Jason - Sure! At the beginning of this Episode Pete was heavily suspected; now he's virtually in the clear. And then there's my situation... we'll talk about that later, though.

MM - Okay, so, Pete situation first. He was basically saved by a bunch of rallying citizens... That must be nice.

Jason - I'm sure he's not complaining, that's for sure.

MM - Well, what about losing Jaya, doesn't that hurt?

Jason - A little bit, yes, but a lot of people suspected her, and those that didn't, like Ellis, were going to suspect her again after this round anyways. She was pretty much already a write off.

MM - So you've lost two Spies from your original team and don't seem phased by it... Do I detect a bit of smugness?

Jason - Well... My objective is to win the game... We're Spies, we backstab for a living. If you can't keep up with me then I have to cut you lose. Alma and Jaya fell behind and were thrown to the wolves.

MM - So it's Alma's fault that you pushed for her exile?

Jason - Yes... I hope she'll understand when the game's over and I've won.

The Intelligent, Witty, Culturally Wise, Significant Rock Star Mofo Trey the Great - You know, this false arrogance thing is getting old, I wonder where you could possibly get it from...

Jason - ......Anyway, what really surprised me was the Paris thing.

MM - I can actually surmise a situation in which the Paris thing is bad for you, but lets see what you think.

Jason - Well, I can see that, too. My plan with Paris was to be WRONG about a citizen, but tow aver enough before hand to make it seem natural. Well, now that wavering could be perceived as a Spy doing EXACTLY what I did... If he'd turned up Citizen the wavering would have been clearly justified, but as things are... It's minor but it might come back to haunt me later in the game.

MM - That is, IF anybody picks up on it later in the game. There'd have to be a very analytic, detail-oriented player left.

Jason - That's why Khaled is going this round and Yvette's going in two or three rounds.

MM - At least you're aware that covering your tracks is important. Speaking of that, how's your situation with the Citizens?

Jason - If my situation was Porno it'd be double penetration, a gangbang, and a really cheesy intro involving a mailman delivering his package to the young girl who answers the door in her lingerie.

MM - Uuuuuhhhhhhh........... Care to clarify that?

Jason - Certainly! Rey, Jenya, Ellis, Tiberius, Gabriela. They all believe I'm a CERTAIN citizen. Not just a citizen, but 100% confirmed. Do you know how great that is??

MM - I know that it's not as Great as I am, but I'm listening.

Jason - Well, it's pretty darn great... I have people that will not only vouch for me, but HELP me bring suspicion on myself to 'not get imprisoned'. This is SO huge because they'll help build my case as to why I've survived into the later rounds without suspecting a thing. And are they really going to think that a Spy would be ASKING to be suspected after only two rounds when his partners are dying left and right?? A Spy would have to be crazy to do that.

MM - Crazy or genius. There's a fine line between the two...

Jason - Exactly. So, that's my plan, but that's not even the best part...

MM - Well, what IS the best part?

Jason - Jenya is the PROTECTOR. She can immunize people from Imprisonment and Exile!!

MM - And she told you this in Round 2?? I'm impressed, Jason.

Jason - I was shocked... Anyway, I KNOW it's a real role because Rey showed up as immune from Imprisonment 2 and she said that she protected him for that round.

MM - So now you can misguide her on who to keep immune?

Jason - No. Now I can let her tell me who she wants immune and if I don't like it I use MY role to misdirect it myself!

MM - Jason... I think you're forgetting something. If you want to role claim to save yourself late in the game, or just want to claim it to confirm yourself even further to people... If you've used it to deflect how Jenya uses her role you'd be caught dead. Even if she's gone, if she mentions to anyone that someone she wanted to protect was Imprisoned anyway you'll be dead. Is that worth the risk just to have some fun with her?

Jason - No... I guess not, My Master.

MM - Be mindful, my Apprentice. You must take the utmost care to be cautious and patient. You must not falter. You must succeed.

Jason - I shall, My Master.

MM - Good. Well, I guess I'll let you get back to plotting; I know you have work to do.

Jason - I shall report in after a successful Episode 3! No Spies will be lynched this round.

MM - I should hope you're right; you're running out of Spies to lose.


Will Jason be able to exploit Jenya's role?
Will the Spies continue their downward spiral into the dark abyss?
Will there be a pink fluffy unicorn ride for Mei Yun?
Tune in next week to find out!!



Edit: Oops, replacing all MM's with MM made iMMune come out funny. Laziness fails again :/

[Ellis]

There are not enough emoticons to describe my feelings when reading this. Dammit, Trey shouldn't even play Spies, he should just write confessionals. Loads and loads and loads of confessionals.

[Kirsten]

Damn Jason. Your confessional was absolutely fantastic. I laughed hard the whole way through. Damn you for both winning and doing it with style.

[Levi]

He stole my TV talk show idea from when I did the interview . . . and did it even better. . . *cries*

[Jason]

Haha thanks guys, and sorry, Levi!!! :"( I was worried when you kept accidentally talking to yourself in the Spies6 chatroom, I thought I had a contender for most schizophrenic self interviews :"(

[DC]

You were a fucking BRILLIANT Spy. There's so much in this confessional to be like, damn, he totally knew what he was doing the entire time. The protection from Jenya/Rey/etc. with the cover of "this is why I haven't been imprisoned", the eliminating analytical citizens, the caution on deflecting Jenya's role, feeding Spies to the burg slowly enough that you look good but still eliminate plenty of Citizens in the meantime. I'm amazed. Wonderful.

[Jason]

; D Well, it's all in the Mountain Dew, of course!